If I ask you what is the hardest thing in one’s life I would get numerous answers from ‘Climbing Mont Blanc’ to ‘The Journey from Rags to Riches’ and so on. However, I think the hardest thing in life would be packing decades of your of life & memories in a suitcase; or writing down the entire 50 years of experience in a two page resume. I felt a similar sense of loss while trying to get 3 decades of my life into one suitcase. Neither, could I leave my things behind nor could I take away all my things. Everything I touched had a good or a bad memory associated with it. While moving from one room to the other room with my mother fretting over everything around me I could see the emptying cupboards and the filling bags. But none of these things could match the sense of loss I was feeling from within.
We have everything new which needs to be packed, but how to leave behind the old ones? They are a part of who we were and what we are today. When we have a pack up from a house full of memories, how does one decide where to start from? What if we leave some of the memories behind? How to decide which memories to even leave behind? It’s very difficult to pack the bags with eyes full of tears & heavy heart. No matter how hard we try, we can’t help break down a few times in the process. Especially when we know that we would no longer be able to come back. After all life is all about moving on and not remaining where we always were. The things would never be the same again. We would no longer be the part of this life again.
There is a new life waiting out there for us; which is chosen & destined for us. It would be even more beautiful than this home. But still leaving home nonetheless is always very tiresome; because out there building our own home is even more difficult. But yes, the peace of living in our own home is the best.
I might sound a little hypocritical in this post hence you all would have to excuse me. But then here it goes, Internet has a significant impact in our lives since its discovery. The entire world now has come to our fingertips. We no longer have to work our asses off to gain any remote information from any corner of the world. The virtual world has become our Reality while Reality seems non-existent. We all live more on the virtual world rather than the real one. Talking to strangers seems more addictive than drugs. But alas, all of this at the cost of our happiness. Now we actually need to wonder is this worth all the effort?
Yes, I know you all would say that I am playing the Devil’s Advocate here. Maybe I am, I am not denying it. But now this is why I decided to write a blog regarding this. I belong to the normal world where I am addicted to the virtual world & all the Social Networking Sites. On one of these I met someone who is so alone & is going through a bad phase of life since past couple of years. I wondered why was he alone with all the 500+ Facebook friends at his fingertips. Out of curiosity I asked the very same question to him. The answer was as I had expected, no one is usually there when we actually need them. Then where is everyone? Why are we so alone when we have all we could ask around us?
Maybe now it’s really the time to untangle ourselves from the evil luring spider sitting on the web he has woven to attract us to it making sure that we never leave. I think the trick worked very well. We are all entangled in this very web we call internet. Searching for someone who will take us away from our hidden loneliness. Somewhere we all are alone too scared to let anyone in thinking that loneliness would be a better company. But is it really a better company? Is it really better than human touch & interaction? I cannot answer this for anyone, each one of you will have to look out for this answer by yourself.
I was one a prey of this web running away from human interaction lonely but still better off by staying that way by choice. Was this choice forced on me? In a way yes, I had forced this upon me. I had made myself miserable assuming that the virtual people are better than the people around me. It cost me a lot of wasted time. Yes, Time a resource we all take extremely casually & by the Time we realize what we have lost we already have lost it.
What we think is hell actually can be someone else’s heaven. Why not? There is always something at the back of our minds which we want most dearly or wish most dearly & we see others having it. We soon conclude that our lives are Hell while the other living your dream is in Heaven. But is it always true? How do we know? Where ever we all are no matter whom do we all talk we all realize that each one of us is unsatisfied at certain levels in our lives. Have we purposefully done it? Or is this what Karma has served us? We shall leave the Karma part for other sometime or else this blog would become a bit too heavy for idiots like us to read. 😛
Now what do we do of these unsatisfied dreams & wishes? Come to think of it we really can’t do much about it other than strive to make our dreams come true or else watch others live our dream. When this happens we literally think that we’re living in Hell and the one living our dream is in Heaven. There will always exist the vicious circle